all these places feel like home

So, I'm back in Chicago, have been for exactly 24 hours now. It felt weird leaving iowa, it felt weird coming back, and it still feels a bit weird being back.

It was good to be home and see everyone again. I realized how much I miss people, and coming back to Chicago wasn't easy. I think the hardest part of leaving was not knowing when I'll be back. Every other time that I've left, I've known specifically when I'd be visiting again, but not this time. That made this trip seem more final.

I was in a grouchy mood when my flight took off from Omaha at 7:20pm Wednesday night. I spent most of the flight reading and day dreaming about things I don't remember, reading some more, reminiscing in my mind about the weekend, feeling homesick and daydreaming some more.

Then we got in-range of Chicago.

The street lights lined the earth in a grid-like pattern, with the occasional diagonal street slicing through the squares. As we got closer to the ground, I began noticing Christmas lights on the houses in suburbia. This made me smile. I love the patterns and shapes streets, houses, trees, lawns, and railroad tracks make that you can only see from a plane. I feel privileged, like I have a single use ticket to an ever-changing art gallery, the earth the canvas. So I plaster my face to the window (if I'm lucky enough to get a window seat) so as not to miss a second of the show or a square inch of the view. Especially at night. Night shows are the best. And then the plane turned and out on the horizon i could see downtown, the tall structures amongst the glowing grid like monolithic boulders. It was a spectacular sight, and I was again excited to be back in the city.

have you ever woken up in the morning, and before you can fully wake up, everything starts running through your mind? Events from the day or week before, big decisions you've made or big purchases you've made come flooding into your mind and you're not quite awake enough to logically think about such things? I have this frequently. This morning it happened again. I think because of the whole 'leaving home again' situation. I woke up this morning and felt overwhelmingly trapped. It was a strange feeling. I don't have a car here and I don't know when I'll be flying home again. I felt helpless, and suffocated. And now I'm mad at myself for thinking that because I really do love it here. But if that's true and I really DO love it here why would I have those thoughts? Is my subconsciousness trying to tell me something? Is God trying to tell me something? Why do I feel trapped and suffocated here when I have more opportunity than I could imagine??

the airplane was a good place to be. I was up away from everything, but could still see everything. The biggest decision I had to make was choosing a soda and did I want peanuts or pretzels? For that hour and twenty minutes I hung between the two worlds that is my life. Behind me, home and my past. Ahead of me, my future.

a few things

I'm going home tomorrow night! yea! I should be packing right now since I haven't yet started. ah well, it'll get done.

Tara W, my college roomate is engaged!! She's getting married in July in Washington, and I'm a bridesmaid :) I'm excited for it, plus cuz I'll get to visit my other friend, Rachel who lives in Seattle at the same time. very good news.

Threadless is opening a brick and mortar store right down the street. I'm excited about this as well.

I saw Massive Change at the MCA tonight. It was very interesting, but very information-heavy. I think I'll go back to absorb some more knowledge after i get back from my christmas break. It was very interesting though, so if you're in the area before the 31st, I'd recommend you check it out.

I rode Santa's Christmas train on the way home tonight. haha. the whole thing was decked out with christmas lights and tinsel, and santa's sleigh even took the place of one of the train cars, AND he was in it! that means he was riding the train, OUTSIDE of the train....in the tunnel. Crazy. The elves on the train gave me a candy cane.

So much excitement...I can barely contain myself.

whoop whoop, who needs an update?

So, a couple updates about the past week. Ahem.

Wednesday: Field Museum Christmas party following an announcement to beat all announcements: Christmas bonuses for all full time employees (myself included) to the amount almost equivelent to my monthly rent. That's something to celebrate considering extra cash is always welcome as far as I'm concerned and the last time FM employees got a cash bonus was over 10 years ago.

Friday: Exhibit designers christmas party at a tapas restaurant. Plenty of laughs and sangria, not to mention some memorable gag-gift exchanges. I actually ended up with a fantastic book that I've been meaning to buy.


That's Thomas on the left, david in the middle and my boss on the right. They're arguing about the rules of our gift exchange game. Hot item: movie tickets and a $20 bill.

Saturday: Volunteering at a children's holiday party for members of the Chicago Athletic Association. I was supposed to be the face painter, but the face paints and the face paint director never arrived. So instead I helped kids make ornaments. It was a fun but very interesting way to spend a Saturday morning and afternoon. It was completely different than I was expecting because it was completely up-scale. Even though it was a carnival with messy crafts and arcade games (including a money booth with real money!) the kids were dressed in their sunday-best, their parents were in suits and dresses and sipping bloody marys and mimosas. There was a huge buffet lunch with salmon and crab cakes, eggs benedict and spinach and cheese stuffed tortellini, not to mention the array of desserts. Gave me a brief glimpse of the way the other half lives and I'm sure glad I didn't grow up with all that.

things i want to do before I die

I decided to make a list of things I want to do before I die...not that I'm chronically ill or anything, it's just a way to give myself some concrete, written goals, things to aim for. So, here it goes, in no particular order:

• Travel...to many places: stonehenge, Chichen Itza (again), New Zealand, the Andes Mountains, St. Peter's Basilica, Taj Mahal, London, the colesseum, caves of lascaux, Venice, palace of versailles....the list goes on! (i better get moving)
• Sky Dive or bungee jump (or both)
• snorkel
• run a marathon or half marathon
• get married
• start my own business
• have kids
• go to grad school
• teach (in some fashion...design, art history, sunday school even!)
• pay off school loans
• buy a house
• be the sole designer of an exhibit at the field
• get my christmas shopping done on time
• inspire kids (and adults) to love art
• buy a boat
• learn how to tango, salsa, swing dance, ballroom dance...anything

list to be continued as I dream up more dreams...

i heard a man preaching on the bus

How should one respond to this? Yesterday on my way to church of all places, the man sitting behind me on the bus started preaching. Well, I don't know if it can be called preaching, though he did quote Revelations and Ezekiel several times. But mostly he kept saying, "my name is Wesley Curry, George Bush saw the vision." He never explained this statement and I was too afraid to question it.

In other news, my supervisor turned down my request for an extended Christmas vacation. I had asked to take off work through New Years Day, but aparently it's not going to happen. I'm kinda bummed about it, but I still get to be home for almost a week!

In even OTHER news, I got a brand new computer at work! It's pretty flashy and suped up with so much ram and memory it could quite possibly fly to the moon. A much needed improvement from the little Mac mini I was working on. Anything you can put in your pocket should not be used for the kind of designing I was doing.

Happiness is yelling BINGO

the words on a keychain owned by a 95 year old woman